Michael_Elliott Scenes from a Mall (1991)** (out of 4) Extremely disappointing comedy has Woody Allen and Bette Midler playing a couple who decide to celebrate their 16th wedding anniversary with a trip to the mall. Things are going pretty well until the husband admits that he just got done the previous day with a seven-month affair and this is where various secrets start to come out. SCENES FROM A MARRIAGE this ain't. There's no question that this movie doesn't work but the real mystery is why it doesn't. I've watched SCENES FROM A MALL a couple times not because it's entertaining but because it's just so strange to see such talent involved in a film that should have been so much better yet it never even reaches a mediocre level. Both Allen and Midler are very good actors who have no issues playing comedy yet they're really letdown by the screenplay, which is a complete mess. We start off with some good introductions to the characters and there are a few funny moments with the two trying to find time to have sex. The scenes at the busy mall start off well enough but there's still something missing from them. What's missing is any sort of laugh but I'm going to guess that writer-director Paul Mazursky just figured people would be "in" on the joke that malls are crowded. Other "in" jokes include three black guys rapping for no apparent reason and then we get a mime that is constantly showing up where the couple are fighting. Mimes are very annoying in my opinion but they can be put to good use at times. Just check out Mel Brooks' SILENT MOVIE for one example. The mime here adds nothing to the story and the attempt at humor falls flat on its face. Another problem with the screenplay is that it really doesn't go anywhere. The "secret" gets let out, they fight, they make up and then another secret follows and we go through the entire thing again before yet another secret comes out. Everything is so predictable that you can start watching the movie anywhere and still understand what you've missed and what's coming up. Allen and Midler are working in an overdrive because it's obvious they're trying hard to make the material work but there's simply nothing there. SCENES FROM A MALL should have been at least mildly entertaining but sadly it's a flop that's only entertainment value is seeing everything that went wrong with it.

jzappa This is a "comedy" that pairs two of the funniest, fieriest Jewish comedians alive. It is about a bickering married couple that works out all their marital problems during a trip to the mall. Sounds great! Get to work. Wait. What is this? This is crap! Fix it! What? You can't? You already filmed it with a second-rate crew in just the past couple of days? What the hell is wrong with you?!I can understand it if Paul Mazursky wasn't as successful as one would think with this film because he didn't want to make the screwball comedy that everyone would expect, but what is so pathetic about this is that there are many moments where the film truly does believe it is being funny, such as the scenes with the irritating mime.Like most modern marriages, after about half an hour you might really want to reconsider your vows with this film, because although it starts blandly enough, you still feel that you can expect the laughs to start piling up, but they never ever do. Not once. Bette and Woody aren't even very good. What do they have with which to work? They can't spark off of one another in spite of generally giving as much as they can to these two-dimensional characters.Overall, this is quite an unnecessary film, a contrived effort to cash in, but with no juices at all except the anticipation of having Bette and Woody in the same film. It's almost unbelievable how bad it is. I understand if one does not trust the almost unanimous bashing this film gets until one actually sees it, because I am guilty of this. Woody Allen, as a writer and director, has never made a bad film. Even his worst film is twice as good if not more than this waste of talent.

Neopetking724 This movie was great, and to an earlier comment, the movie wasn't filmed in California, it was filmed in Stamford Connecticut. DUH. The movie made my sides split. What is the matter with you people? Woodie Alan is so funny in this! I am in an acting class in Palm Beach Atlantic University, and going by what my teacher has said, they did an awesome acting job, and I thought that the movie as a whole was hilarious. Some people are so caught up in critiquing movies that they don't know how to enjoy movies anymore, just for the pure enjoyment. Maybe it's just my personal judgement but this movie rocked my socks and made me wanna pee in my pants. Too bad no one else could see this.

drosse67 He lives in Southern California. He spends time in a mall. He carries a surfboard. He wears a ponytail. Is this really Woody Allen, or an imposter? This movie received a critical beating when it came out, but it's really not that bad. In fact, I sort of got a kick out of seeing Woody in this. He is well matched by Bette Midler, who reprises her Down and Out in Beverly Hills character. Director Paul Mazursky, who usually makes either Southern California or Manhattan-set social comedies, brings Woody out to the Beverly Hills that he's trashed in so many movies (the most obvious being Annie Hall), and plucks him into the center of '80s and '90s California consumerism--the mall. The story involves Allen and Midler discussing their infidelities in various mall settings, but the dialogue is merely a clothesline for the idea. It was a hard idea to pull off, but I, being the Woody Allen fan that I am, enjoyed it.