Moe, Larry and Curly are three out-of-work tramps who are hired to promote a university football team. They're soon mistaken for the school's famous star athletes, "The Three Horsemen." As the star athletes, the Stooges are hired by a gangster to secretly play on his professional team, but of course the boys know nothing about football and bring their own set of skills to the game.

At Los Arms Hospital, three brainless interns - Doctors Howard, Fine and Howard - promise Dr. Graves, the hospital superintendent, that they will devote the rest of their lives to "duty and humanity!" Instructed to rush to any room whenever "Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard" is heard over the loudspeaker, call after call features an assortment of surreal, oddball doctors, nurses and patients. An emergency leads them to operate on Dr. Graves himself, after he accidentally swallows the combination to a safe containing life-saving radium.

Moe, a boxing manager, discovers that when Larry plays "Pop Goes the Weasel" on his violin, Curly goes berserk and punches any available target. Moe offers to manage Curly as the ring's newest boxing sensation and hires Larry to play his violin ringside. At the championship fight, Larry's violin is broken and he frantically searches the streets for an alternate source of music.

The boys join the Woman Haters Club, pledging their money and vowing that they'll never take a wife. Jim (Larry) soon reneges when he secretly marries his sweetheart named Mary. Jim takes his bride with him on a sales trip/honeymoon and tries to hide his marriage from his two partners, who happen to be on the train. Mary learns the secret, and suckers both Tom and Jack (Moe and Curly) into romancing her to teach her husband a lesson.