Sam Panico You remember that interview where Vanilla Ice tried to explain why he didn't steal Queen/David Bowie's "Under Pressure?"I'd like to hear whoever did the music for this movie to explain how they added a "da na na" to the theme from Halloween. Then again, there's plenty more that this movie owes to that film.A killer with a kitchen knife is on the prowl, killing off college kids. And he's on the way to Lanier College during finals.Meanwhile, a fraternity stages a mass shooting to help their members pass a chemistry test. How does this plan work? Who comes up with such a plan?While students prepare for the end of the year, the killer is hiding among them. We have Courtney, who is the Final Girl, of course. Her roommate is Lisa, who is all into the hot professor. Well, not really hot. He's a professor, though.For some reason, all of the pledges can't dare anyone. But Gary is in love with Janet and pins her, so he gets punished by being tied up to a tree, his underwear filled with ice and then sprayed with shaving cream. What? Where did this ritual come from? Who goes through with this? Even the rest of the town, like the security guard, follow these rules. What is the deal with this school?Well, he's tied up and the killer gets him. Then it gets his girlfriend, too. While that's going on, Wildman, a frat guy, is looking for pain pills when he gets killed by a Universal weight machine. His friend Mark tries to find him and he gets killed.Then we have Radish, who isn't gay in the movie but would totally be a proud out character if this was made after 1981. He's constantly looking for killers and has a great poster collection of old films. All his knowledge of murder doesn't help, as he's instantly killed.Lisa tries to model for her boyfriend in the nude, but she gets killed, too. And now we're down to one and the killer even catches an arrow and stabs the coach with it when he tries to save Courtney. But then he falls into a hole and she stabs him to death. That's it. That's the fight he puts up.Written and directed by Jimmy Huston (My Best Friend Is a Vampire), this is pretty much Halloween with a killer who was too lazy to get a mask (he was also the fight coordinator for the film).That said, I wasn't bored, I laughed out loud at many of the things that Radish did and said, and I enjoyed the arrow catching scene. You'll be filled with questions. Like, how much chaffing did the short shorts of the 80's cause?

ersinkdotcom For every good slasher film in the 1980s, there were ten that should've never seen the light of day. Some of those misfires have gained cult status over the years for one reason or another. It's tough to truly judge a movie in a genre that celebrates bad acting, cheesy dialogue, and nonsensical plots. 1981's "Final Exam" is a perfect example of one such film that is beloved by many today for, in my opinion, no good reason at all.A serial killer walks the streets of Lanier College as the students prepare for a week of final exams and frat hazing. With no apparent motive or target demographic, the murderer hunts down both jocks and nerds without prejudice. Can anyone stop the madman before he takes his next victim?I can appreciate what Writer/Director Jimmy Huston was trying to do with "Final Exam." He was attempting to make a film in the vein of "Halloween" using Hitchcock's sensibilities and techniques. Huston did his best to establish characters the audience would connect to. Unfortunately, the fact that none of the performers playing them could act annihilated any hopes of that happening.It would've also helped if the murderer had ANY sort of motive for his killing spree. It's just some guy following college kids around and butchering them. B-O-R-I-N-G! Slasher movies either have to have one thing or another going for it. It has to be suspenseful or graphic and gory when it comes to the violence. "Final Exam" doesn't excel in either of these areas. The suspense is smothered by a lack of motivation and the kill scenes are absent of any real substance or bloodshed."Final Exam" is rated R for violence, language, adult situations, and nudity. Of course, there's the obligatory boob shot all slasher films must have. There's so little on screen gore that the movie quite possibly could air right after an episode of "Goosebumps" on Teen Nick. If made today without the one scene of nudity, it might earn a PG-13 rating for its content.As far as slasher movies are concerned, "Final Exam" is a weak entry into the genre. I'm sure many fans of the film will disagree with me and they have every right to. I can't consider it an essential piece of horror history based on its lack of motivation, suspense, and gore. Without those elements, it's just another bland B-movie with bad acting.

dien Being an 80s slasher fan, I've seen a lot of them. The good, the bad, the classics and the garbage. This one is somewhere between boring and uninteresting.I read on Wikipedia that the director wanted to do a different slasher. One that focuses on character development rather than kills. While it may have sounded great as an idea, the outcome is poor.If we don't count the first kill, the movie takes more than 50 minutes before anything slasher-related happens. The film spends so much time on the characters that it feels almost like a teen comedy. And one can only wish the characters were somewhat interesting, but they're not. They are as generic as they get. There are the obnoxious jocks, the computer nerd, the dumb blond who has an affair with a teacher and the "not so attractive, yet strong" final girl.The killer is a chapter of its own. We never learn his motivation, or who he is. But we can clearly see his face from the very beginning. Also, he would absolutely need to have "serial killer super powers" in order to appear at certain places where there is no way he could get without someone noticing him. Simply impossible. I understand the writer wanted to go for something else in his film, but this decision was poor.This film fails on pretty much every level. It's only recommended if you're a die hard genre fan.

Dagon Final Exam was an attempt made by Jimmy Huston, the film's director, for creating a Slasher title that tried ignoring the obvious boundaries that haunt the genre. This was the same man that would later go on to create a more popular product in 1987's My Best Friend is a Vampire. Teamed up with Huston is Gary S. Scott who arranged some of the music featured on Fox's Funhouse (hosted by J.D. Roth) in 1988, and in that same year allowed his musical hand to complete 31 episodes of Freddy's Nightmares (1988-1990).The film takes place at Lanier College and opens up with a murder at another campus. The killer is an unknown assailant who holds no ties to the cast in question; just a lunatic out for blood. The viewing audience is strung along on a 50-minute "heartfelt" exhibition of a "rigorous" college life. A second murder occurs in close proximity and poses a threat to the well-being of the young crowd as the remaining minutes display the disposal of the characters in a quick, albeit cheap, fashion.My description of Final Exam is brief because there's not too much to say, honestly. Mockingly I mentioned the heartfelt moments contained within – so many, in fact, it'll cause you to feel as if you're watching an after-school special or an episode of Full House rather than a movie filled with dread. The director wanted to avoid the usual Slasher routine so instead he opted to focus more on character development. I wonder who told him that this was a good idea – sure, not enough character involvement is unwise and too much of it in a Slasher film is boring…why can't there be a balance of both? Is that such a cross to bear? "Ugh, toiling endlessly on creating a decent film for audiences to appreciate…such a burden," Huston says to himself in the waking hours of daybreak. I'm curious as to why the horror genre attracts so many foolish wannabes who have the urge to pick up a camera and start filming absolutely nothing; almost like a curse, a hex if you will, which I suppose would be rather fitting. Seriously, film-makers should create a movie about a director who thrives on creating sloppy films that contain no substance or value – oh wait, they already did, and they based it on Ed Wood.Everything about this movie is dumb – which shouldn't be viewed as a wild accusation since the majority of films in the Slasher sub-genre are not only inadequate but also incompetent. The dialog alone should be a subject of ridicule with Oscar-rated material such as this to cleanse your palette:"I leave in the morning for the big city. You're gonna be left with nothing' but that saggin' old wife of yours. *Laughs arrogantly* She must almost be 30 by now?"Out of all the Slasher titles that involve students at a University or high school, I'd suggest watching those instead, more precisely, ANYTHING over Final Exam. Watching paint dry will become a favorite past time after experiencing the dregs of boredom that this movie invokes within its viewers. Final Exam executes the movement of a snail too perfectly and allows 1984's Girls Nite Out to look like a Masterpiece Theatre rendition of Julius Caesar.