BA_Harrison I was hoping that Mistress of the Apes would be an enjoyable piece of jungle sexploitation, with gorgeous blonde lead Jenny Neumann being the female equivalent of Tarzan, swinging through the trees in nothing but a loincloth; this is most definitely not the case.Neumann plays Susan Jamison, wife of a famous anthropologist, who travels to the Congo region to try and find her missing husband, unaware that he has been murdered by poachers. What follows is a rather tepid adventure, with Susan and her pals Laura and Paul learning the truth and trying to avoid becoming the poachers' next victims, while also befriending a troop of ape-men, the missing link between Australopithecus and homo sapiens.While there is a little exploitative content - most notably the (not-too-graphic) rape of Laura by the baddies, and Susan breast-feeding an ape-child (who looks just like any ordinary baby) and having sex with one of the lucky banana-eating knuckle-draggers - the film is mostly a real snooze fest.As a fan of horror films and the art of special effects make-up, I found that the most interesting thing about the whole movie was the fact that the ape-men makeup was created by Oscar winner Greg Cannom (The Lost Boys, The Mask) and Oscar nominee Rob Bottin (Robocop, The Thing).

Drago_Head_Tilt This particularly odd Buchanan concoction opens with some street punks with guns holding-up a NYC hospital for drugs. Jenny Neumann is a pregnant patient who suffers a miscarriage as a result. While recuperating she gets word that photographs taken by her photographer husband who went missing in the Congo have been discovered. They seem to show missing link ape men (pretty good face make-up by Greg Cannom, assisted by Rob Bottin). So she goes to "Africa" (Malibu State Park, not a convincing substitute) to continue the research. Her guide and most of the men she meets (including Stuart Lancaster from Russ Meyer movies as a poacher) are total sleazeballs, so a welcome alternative is to befriend the ape men, eventually sleeping with one (!) and staying in the jungle to become a mother (or "Ape Lady" as the jaunty, out-of-place theme tune, not dissimilar to the one from QUEEN KONG, puts it). Amid this loopiness, the sexy, very leggy Neumann has welcome topless scenes. One guy says to his girl "why don't you just shut up and...function". With Barbara Leigh and a man-in-a-suit gorilla. It's just the kind of endlessly tedious yet hypnotically odd obscurity that late night TV was made for. Nicholas Josef von Sternberg (son of highly respected Golden Age Hollywood Director Josef von Sternberg) was the Cinematographer (he had previously shot DOLEMITE, ALEX Joseph AND HIS WIVES and DEATH DRUG among others, and went on to shoot the likes of SKINHEADS, NO RETREAT NO SURRENDER 2 and HOSPITAL MASSACRE). Buchanan made THE LOCH NESS MONSTER next.Movie reviews @ spinegrinderweb.com

caspian1978 I don't know about you, but I sat through a good thirty minutes of this movie without a complaint. Why? Because, I felt it would have been a worthy investment to sit through the terrible opening of the film, with its terrible story line and its terrible acting, just to get to see Jenny Neumann have sex with an "Ape Man." I never got to see it because it never happened. I don't know what version you guys watched but I sat through a 90 minute badly lighted movie with hopes to see 30 seconds of a nudity. Was it worth it? No. But it has been on the video rental shelf for the past 20 years and still gets rented because of that fact. By reading the title and looking at the front cover, there is hope that there's going to be at least one animal sex scene in the movie.

J. Mike Perkins One of bad film master Larry Buchanan's best. Features a stupid yet potent mix of sex, bad science, fake jungle sets, horrible makeup, and incredible music ("She used her charms to tame the wild, she thought of everything except what to name the child"). A very cute-sexy blonde babe leaves the city (the "Urban Jungle") for what is said to be Africa after a hospital accident. She finds a tribe of "Near Men" (they only have one female, but it gets killed). The Near Men look like football players with some mud packed on their faces, but they are said to be apes. She learns their grunt language, breast feeds their baby, and, in the interest of science, starts having rampant sex with all of them. Movies don't get much better.