thesar-2 Whelp, From Dusk Till Dawn is now considered Rated G thanks to this updated Hatchet-version.(Before I continue, #1 there's more to my comparison than claiming there are vampires in this feature - they're not and #2 by "updated" I meant more than decade after when From Dusk Till Dawn was released. The Cottage is now 10 years old, but I just now discovered it.)I digress...but, wait, 10 years old now and no sequel? Shame!I digress again. The "Horror" entertainment streaming channel, Shudder, has certainly tricked me before. I pay the subscription price for HORROR and sometimes begin an unknown movie to me and it's engaging, but by the time it's over, it's certainly NOT horror. It ends up being an action, comedy, revenge or just dark drama. But, not horror. Shudder seems to think if there's one tiny scene of someone accidently cutting themselves or being accused of a crime in a flashback, it's horror. It's not. I'd say nice try, and while I like a ton of the movies I do watch on Shudder that happen to NOT be horror, I'm pissed because that's not I went in for. That's not what I'm paying Shudder for.Shoot. Do I have to digress again? Not really. I'm getting to my point in three, two...The moment The Cottage began, I simultaneously liked it and thought: here we go again - another non-Horror, but enjoyable dark film on Shudder. The opening credits and music immediately sets the tone for fun, humor and dark-twists. And it delivers, tenfold. Well, for at least the first half of the movie.Two ridiculously inept kidnapper brothers take their incredibly annoying victim to the Movie's Title and as their on-paper good plan hilariously falls apart and more and more bad things happen, they couldn't have predicted just HOW BAD THINGS COULD GET.Heck, I couldn't even see what's coming as it appears Movie 1 ended about half-way through and its immediate sequel upped the ante in blood, gore, tension and kills tenfold. (See? From Dusk Till Dawn, but on steroids.)This was a gem I stumbled across and was super glad I did. As stated, I already liked it a ton when it was a straight up, dark (and hilarious) comedy with some gore and I liked to see where it was going. Not to mention it's ALWAYS great seeing the fantastic Andy Serkis in "real life." But, when the movie switched over to its bloody conclusion, tension spiked, the interest swelled and it was a no hold barred roller coaster of unpredictable madness. Can't think of many negatives here, except I could NOT stand the character of the kidnapped victim, though, obviously, she played her role perfectly to advance the plot and characters around her. It was just, personally, I probably would've shot her in the head and forget the money. Totally worth it. The only other slight negative and, again, this is personal, so it's what I see through my eyes and the film should not be held to my own standards: far too many mistakes and incredible missed opportunities were made by the characters. Granted, that was who they were, but dang, sometimes it was frustrating. To me, anyways.The movie was tight, kept us mostly in the dark with exposition, though gave us enough knowledge of what's going on and it didn't overstay its welcome, talk down to the audience or force feed us anything we didn't need to know to advance the story. While I joked earlier about the lack of a sequel, none is really needed to explain more. In fact, it might hinder the setup here and definitely would be inferior to all they accomplished in this one.Needless to say, I was blown away and would highly recommend this movie. Especially for fans of horror-comedies and for those who liked Shaun of the Dead, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, The Cabin in the Woods, Severance, the other similarly titled, Cottage Country and as referenced: Hatchet and From Dusk Till Dawn.Oh, and FINally, make sure you stay/fast forward to the end of the credits. I usually don't say that for theatre experiences, but since this is only available for home viewing...it's worth it.***Final thoughts: I'm definitely considering buying this, but sadly, it doesn't look like it's on BluRay, yet, anyways. Too bad. This is a hidden treasure more fans should absolutely support.....and so I did. I just bought it now. Under $7 DVD, not bad, and even better, I had $2.77 in reward points, so brand new and unrated for $4.21. Not bad! Still, I'd recommend you supporting this whether on streaming or DVD, with or without the discount.

Nigel P Reviewing a comedy is difficult. If you examine the jokes too much, they fall apart. If you quote various lines out of context, they lose their impact. 'The Cottage' is very much of the type that deserves to be watched, enjoyed and left at that.To skirt over the story, David (Andy Serkis) and Peter (Reece Shearsmith) have kidnapped Tracey (Jennifer Ellison) but the situation becomes more complicated than any of them could imagine. Then, those complications become complicated … and so on. Even in the very last scene, the situation that has taken on such satisfyingly ridiculous proportions becomes … even more complicated.My one real problem with this are the excessive profanities. At the risk of sounding like everyone's elderly parents, I found such expletives are shockingly funny to begin with, but become wearisome once they are established as the normal way of speaking. Other than that, this is a fine slice of black comedy. Politically incorrect in places, but mainly the laughs come from the extravagant blood and gore on display.Tracey's large breasts only feature once as the focal point of the comedy, serving only as a distraction allowing her to get the better of Peter. The males are the subject of the humour here, their ineptitude and consistent failures causing the mayhem that propels the story. It's good to see Hellraiser's Doug Bradley in this, but a shame his appearance is limited to a 'villager with dog' credit.All performances are enjoyable, with the excellent Shearsmith getting the brunt of the gory punishment. With Serkis, it is easy to note his performances as a number of CGI creations in other films, but this is a reminder what a good 'physical' actor he is too.

Maz Murdoch (asda-man) The Cottage always appealed to me. I saw that it was a British horror-comedy and no one does horror-comedy quite like us Brits, given the track record of greats such as, Severance and Shaun of the Dead. It also stars Reece Shearsmith whom I have loved from the wonderful TV series, Psychoville and it's a slasher! What's not to like? Why, from the looks of the reviews it looked like there was a lot not to like, so I held off from buying it for a while. However, when I saw it for a couple of quid in a wonderfully cheap DVD shop in Blackpool I thought that there was nothing to lose. There wasn't. Whilst it doesn't quite reach the heights of the horror-comedy genius from Shaun of the Dead or Severance, I think I could safely say that it's as good as the under-rated zomedy, Cockneys Vs Zombies.The Cottage has a great set-up with two bumbling brothers, shoddily staging a kidnapping with feisty Jennifer Ellison. I thought that it was a much more original set-up for a slasher, rather than the tired old kids going on holiday to abandoned cottage. In fact, the slasher element doesn't entirely come into play until about halfway in, but there's no need to worry because like Severance, the 'non-horror half' is by no means less entertaining. It's full of funny banter and fantastic characters who you'll feel sad to see go. I especially enjoyed Reece Shearsmith's cowardly idiot and Steven O' Donnell's even bigger idiot who has some seriously funny lines to say. Doug Bradley's came could've been better, but it's fantastic that he's in it.Things do get especially interesting when a deformed serial-killing farmer is hilariously introduced out of nowhere. I think most films would benefit from a character like this appearing halfway through. This is an obvious pastiche from those wonderful 80's slasher films where a deformed lunatic bumps everyone off. In fact, The Cottage has a great 80's horror vibe throughout which I enjoyed immensely and so should every other horror fan. To top it off the death scenes a humorously over-the-top and great fun. But the reason this slasher works so well is because of its great characters and incredibly witty screenplay. A lot of people say that the humour doesn't work, but for me it did. Although predictable at times, it was still directed with energy to ensure ceasing any dull moments.Yes the quote on the back of the DVD saying that it's the horror event of 2008 is way over the top, considering that 2008 is the year that graced Eden Lake, Let the Right One In and Martyrs to the screen (all three in my top 10 horror films of all time). Nevertheless, The Cottage is way better than you'd expect, given the unfair criticism the film gets. It's a fun, fast, funny and often thrilling ride that can be watched over and over again. I think that it's even a little bit better than Hatchet!

trashgang For 4 years it was laying on the shelve 'not seen' at my place. finally i had a look at it and I must say that it enjoyed me a lot. As a comedy it doesn't fulfill but as a horror it does deliver.Due it rather started as a crime flick it quickly turns into a comedy when the hijacked girl Tracey (Jennifer Ellison) goes berserk and turns against the hijackers Peter (Reece Shearsmith), the nerd and David (Andy Serkis), the brain. From there on you can't see what's coming and slowly it turns into a gory flick. If you just can stand the first 10 minutes then you're into a nice flick.But it is the combination of Tracey, Peter and David that works here in this flick. They all gave a sublime acting and it's weird to see that Jennifer stopped also in 2008 with acting. Of course Reece already came from a comedy/horror Shaun Of The Dead (2004). Andy of course we knew from doing voice overs for the ape Ceasar in Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes (2011) and in TinTin (2011) as the Hadock voice. Don't go watching it for the icon Doug Bradley, he's only a few minutes in it. But do watch it for the gore and funny situations. ExcellentGore 3/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 4/5 Story 4/5 Comedy 1/5