BaronBl00d Why is Ernest Dickerson a Master of Horror? Because he directed Surviving the Game and Demon Knight? Hmmm. Definitely not one of the better moments of the series, yet not a total waste of time nor talent. Two youths, bored and one in particular having issues with the break-up of his family, decide to visit a morgue at night for laughs. Laughs is not what they find but rather vampires. Both get bitten eventually, and what we have here is a story about vampirism from the bitten's perspective. Been there - seen it before. The first fifteen minutes or so are very creepy and eerie. Dickerson, despite my sarcasm, has talent, but the story completely falls apart toward the middle and I couldn't even find it by the end. The acting is all acceptable. Yes, Michael Ironsides is in it. Yes, he looks very creepy. He also is given very little to do. Truth be told: I was very disappointed with this episode.

Coventry Two teenagers break into a sinister and remote funeral parlor because they're bored with playing videogames and because they dared each other to. Hey wow, teenagers still do that sort of stuff? I thought it was a typically dumb act to do for teenagers back in the 1980's, but not in this modern day and age? I can list a dozen of cheesy and inferior old films with that exact same premise, and they were kind of fun and charming, but I never suspected a relatively acclaimed TV-format like "Masters of Horror" would recycle this ancient horror given. "The V- Word" (V standing for vampire, or at least I'm presuming so) is easily the most mediocre installment of the two seasons combined. Not only the plot is extremely mundane, but also Ernest Dickerson's direction is pedestrian, the acting performances are weak and the gore-effects are not at all remarkable. There's a total lack of humor in this episode and even the always reliable Michael Ironside cannot safe the film from utter boredom. He plays a vampire with the intention of "recruiting" the two young boys as children of the night. The only difference between these vampires and good old Bela Lugosi on TV is that eating habits are a lot messier. Bela only left two discrete biting marks whereas these vampires literally tear the necks of their victims wide open. The violence is explicit and nasty, pretty much similar like the "Doom" videogames that the two protagonists are obsessed with, but it's thoroughly unexciting. In fact, the only true positive words I can write in favor of "The V-Word" are all intended for Lynda Boyd. She plays the mother of one of the teenagers and her role is relatively small, but she's one mighty fine looking MILF!

MARIO GAUCI Another less-than-enthusing entry in this erratic series concerns one of the most abused subjects in horror-film history i.e. vampirism – and, yet, it has rarely been dealt with such a visceral (and frankly off-putting) approach. The blood flows in bucketfuls here and rather than bite its victims, the creature tears open their throat like a werewolf or a latter-day zombie would! The chief vampire is played by Michael Ironside (as Mr. Chaney!) in full Jack (THE SHINING) Nicholson mode, while his victims/successors are your typical teens: one white and one black, obsessed with carnage-happy video games but who cringe in the face of real death – so they dare one another to enter a morgue at night and take a good look at the latest 'intern'…and that is where their troubles begin. Their reactions, however, are different: while the black boy seems resigned to have joined the ranks of the undead (culminating in a predictable coda, down to the ironic closing line, as he sets out to 'infect' The Big Apple), the other resists – especially after Ironside kidnaps his kid sister to be the blood donor in his initiation! – and commits suicide, awaiting the dawn tied to a cross, in a show-stopping finale. Along the way, the film references NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968; a quotation of the famous line "They're coming to get you, Barbara!"), AN American WEREWOLF IN London (1981; the white kid who escapes the initial attack feels remorse for having abandoned his pal to his fate), BLACK SABBATH (1963; the black kid appears at the other's home claiming to be all right and pleading with his friend to let him in) – and, for good measure, we get various snippets from the Browning/Lugosi Dracula (1931) conveniently showing on TV!

Lilith Hexus All right, I have just finished watching the first showing of "The V Word" on Showtime, and having done so I have a few things to say. "The V Word" is an episode about a new-breed of vampiric legend. While they do retain many of the traditional myths, they've adapted to a new ideal.The concept for this episode is done in the best and worst of ways. While they captured the realistic nature of the idea of vampires, seeing as how rather than any psychical change they simply tear the throat of their victim out and drink the blood. Once they've had their throat removed, or at least most of it, they go through a seemingly agonizing transformation, and forever retain that physical would that never seems to heal over. It takes the idea and makes it somewhat believable, at least until the bad part comes into play.And here is that bad theme.While they've been created in this way to be believable, they seem to include some of the more silly stereotypes. These vampires do not have fangs, which makes sense, however, they burst into flames under the touch of sunlight, and it is implied that they are allergic to garlic, all though I don't think they made that official or not.It's a good episode, and a very impressive concept... however, it is insulting the basic idea of a vampire, as well as fans of the sort.However, this one does seem to have better acting than most, and it has the girl from Silent Hill in it, which amused me.Overall... I'd give this episode a 6/10.