GL84 Getting stranded at a roadside motel, a group of friends find themselves trapped in the area by a gang of ghosts looking to change the fortunes of how they died and must find a way of stopping it from happening.This is an overall run-of-the-mill ghost film that really doesn't offer too much one way or another about providing good parts or bad. The fact that the whole film barely offers up any kind of rational explanation for what's going on really mar this one because it's the one that does the most damage to what's going on here. The brief running time, itself a problem on numerous levels, never gives us a change to get fully invested in anything or even a chance to develop any sort of coherent storyline between what's happening and who these people are that have stumbled onto the secret, haunted location. It's only in the final, closing minutes that something resembling an explanation is offered for why everything's going on and it's tacky, hokey and completely unrealistic in many ways, offering one of the wackiest and most nonsensical explanations ever for what kind of haunting story this really is. The fact that there's so little time to work through things and just spends so much time on them wandering around the hotel itself in their own little groups with their own problems is somewhat boring and infuriating to sit through, and all of these go right back to the film never offering up a lot of explanations about what's going on in here. There's some bright spots, though, with the fact that the opening explanation for why the particular locale is haunted does make some rather chilling moments than what would be expected in such a film as this, and it leads into the explanation rather nicely as it is. As well, there's a few rather intense scares throughout this one as the hauntings come at quite unexpected times and allow for a few chilling surprises to come out. While not entirely flawed, this one does have enough to lower it from it's supposed strengths.Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, children-in-jeopardy, heavy drug use and Rape.

Kerry Hill Wow, what can I say about 'No Tell Motel' apart from the fact it is absolutely awful. It follows a group of teenagers on a road trip (unoriginal) who somehow manage to flip their RV over through just having a simple argument. They conveniently stop by an abandoned motel they then find out later is haunted.I have numerous problems with this film, first and foremost, the horrific acting. None of it was believable, the arguments looked fake and down right cheesy. The most notorious one being when the blonde girl Megan Walsh says 'it's settled, we're staying' at this point,I just laughed because it sounded utterly ridiculous. Nothing was ever properly explained and random things just seemed to be thrown in and we never actually find out what significance they have to the narrative, if they have any at all. One example of this would be when the 'boyfriend' i'm guessing? since its never actually solidified he is, takes some sort of drug that we are never informed on what it is so we are left wondering what the hell he's been taking and he randomly pulls a gun out of no where. where exactly did he get that from? we don't know, and we never find out!the narrative was extremely badly written, nothing made sense and nothing had any relevance. It takes all the expected horror movie traits and makes them worse than they could possibly be. If anything, I actually found this movie quite humorous especially when Megan's friend get hit by a car. She is laying there dead in the road, blood coming out of her head, they run over and couldn't look less surprised. either she wasn't a very good friend or the actors evidently didn't know how a group of whiny teenagers should react to the death of their friend. What really made me laugh is the fact they completely dismissed her death, left her dead in the road and brought the guy that hit her into the motel. A total stranger that they didn't know? I also don't think running over a girl's head would make you crash so severely that you're knocked out and bleeding. For the rest of the film, there's no mention of her!The film overall was predictable as hell and I couldn't possibly list all the things that annoyed me about it. I found it really difficult to watch it till the end since I was just so bored, I stopped paying it so much attention after about 30 minutes. Despite the fact I should probably write something positive about it, I'm finding it really hard to pick out anything I liked, I guess the cinematography wasn't too bad. my advice for anyone thinking about watching this is, don't. And for the life of you do not pay money for it, if you want to laugh at the expense of terrible film making go ahead. But if you're looking for scares, don't bother, you wont find any here.

Rich Wright There's a line in one of my favourite films called Ratatouille (though I feel I'm soiling it by even bringing it up here) that tells us Anyone Can Cook... even a rodent. Well, anyone can make a horror film... even an idiot. But that doesn't mean they should. Especially one devoid of scares, where the dumb people barely react when their 'friends' bite the bullet, and when the 'twist' is like, the stupidest thing EVER in the history of mankind. And yes, we all know little girls who just stand there staring at you saying nothing, are naturally creepy, but overuse this formula and you're liable to be accused of lacking ideas. The dude behind the camera here hasn't got an original thought in his noggin.It's not big, it's not clever and it certainly isn't the least bit enjoyable. F's all round, and back to film school for you, Mr Wannabe. Sometimes, I think it would be easier to teach a cat to fetch than make a decent scary movie... 3/1

callist How do you spell out that sound where you draw in air through your teeth as if you're looking at something that hurts? Ffffff? Because that's kind of the title I was looking for for this review.Yes, I did think it was that horrible. This was the sort of movie where, after I was done watching, I was pretty sure that I'd just seen the worst movie out of all the ones I've ever seen (that's probably overstating it, but as I seem to have actually blocked out any worse movies from my memory to live in peaceful ignorance, it's all I've got). It's definitely in my 'Top 3 Worst Movies' and it's the 'So bad it's horrible' kind.So, what was wrong with it? Well, for one, this was pretty generic both in the way it starts out and the ideas behind it - 'ideas' because this seems to be two generic horror plots mashed together to form one big pile of generic-feeling goo. Generically. Blending ideas can provide exciting new twists and improve the product but not for this bad boy.For two, it seemed to have trouble finding it's angle. It wasn't really a super slashy flick, it wasn't psychological, it wasn't really anything - just 'blah' (though, on a related note, it seemed the characters didn't have the same problem of finding a type - they were all the classic stereotypes).Three: THE ACTING. Dear Universe, it was so bad that even I could tell it was bad - and that's how you KNOW you're in trouble.And lastly, the script. It wasn't a good script, don't let anybody fool you. Some of the things the characters say just baffled me throughout it - whether it was super-over-expositioning something or saying something that just really didn't seem like it fit in the movie at all. Just bad.Really, a rating of 3< is REALLY generous for this movie.